Foxy Critique - Storm of Hope by Leila Tualla

Hello everyone, and welcome to another segment of Foxy Critique. This week’s review focuses on Storm of Hope by Leila Tualla. This critique will be a little different. As a non-fiction book/poetry collection, the typical categories that I use for ranking will be different than those I do for fiction stories. As usual, each category will be followed by a description of what I look for in the category, my notes on the book, and its score. Twaddle clause: Anything I say can and probably is, pure and utter twaddle. My opinions on the book bear no reflection on my personal opinions of the author and are strictly about the contents within. You can find a link to the book’s page at the bottom. If you purchase the book, please be sure to support the author by leaving a review.

Alright, with technicalities out of the way, I can begin. Storm of Hope (subtitled God, Depression, Preeclampsia, and Me) is a short read that blends the poems and memoir of Leila’s struggles with her faith and the aforementioned conditions.

Now, as a man, I clearly am no expert on preeclampsia. I had to do a bit of research into the condition to understand the ramifications and symptoms of the disorder. As such, I can’t ever really claim to understand what it was like for the author to go through such, but I can empathize greatly with depression and faith.

I’m starting with a little personal information about myself, just so you, the readers, can understand where I’m coming from in regards to potential bias. I’m what is called a “transcendentalist”. For those of you who haven’t studied literature and are looking at the screen in confusion, I’ll explain.

A transcendentalist is a Christian...sort of. You’ll never see a Transcendentalist church, because we don’t really believe in churches. Typically, sundays are reserved for personal meditation, prayer, and just general relaxation. Transcendentalists believe in what’s called the “over-soul”, which in a nutshell is the divine light that shines in all living things. God isn’t a singular entity to most transcendentalists but is an all-encompassing thing (I don’t really know a good word to describe it) that connects everyone and everything. No, I’m not a vegetarian. As easy as it is to think so, recall that vegetables are living things too, so it’s really just more of an acceptance that everyone has to eat. But I’m getting sidetracked. Point is, transcendentalists believe that God’s love has no limits, in the sense that there aren’t any conditions to get into heaven. His love for us is like the love our parents should have for us. It doesn’t matter how badly we screw up, because at the end of the day, God’s love transcends whatever problems we face, so long as we recognize them as problems. This includes even going so far as to follow another religion.

As a personal note, I’ve always subscribed to the Hindu philosophy of the “one mountain”. There are many paths up the one mountain, but the one we take is our own and we all reach the same place in the end. I believe that everyone believes what they need to to get through their life. Right or wrong objectively isn’t important, so long as you are doing what you think is right and feel remorse when you do wrong.

Getting away from religion a bit, I’ve suffered with depression many times in my life. I was born with a rare heart condition called Wolff-Parkinson-White Syndrome, where an extra electrical impulse (or in my case 16 extra electrical impulses) are in your heart that intercept signals from the top chamber to the bottom, resulting in an overly rapid heartbeat. When I was 9 years old, I had these muscles removed, but my heart has always beat a little faster than normal since anyway. I’ve also had kidney stones on a near monthly basis since I was 12, and while a diet was the issue, it had nothing to do with salt or soda (surprisingly). I've also had clinical depression, ADHD, and Asperger's for almost my entire life, and I take medication for all three. Basically, I’m not stranger to hospital stays, doctors, or therapists, and while I can’t say I know precisely what the author went through, I’m giving this background as an explanation of where my opinions are coming from.

Category 1 - Technical Skill (Literary Value)

Like Literary Value, Technical Skill is based on the author’s use of mechanics as well as the emotional impact it leaves behind. Good Technical Skill is a result of strong word usage, poetic skill, and the ability to use syntax. Does the book have many errors? Is all the poetry free form, and if so, is it still impactful? Does the author convey the proper emotions?

Storm of Hope does an excellent job of speaking for itself. Even those who don’t know anything about preeclampsia (as I didn’t before reading the book) will still be able to get a glimpse into the ramifications within it. While I personally didn’t find the poetry to be anything stunning or spectacular compared to other poetry I’ve read, the memoir segments in between shined brightly enough to simply override any penalty that the poems could give.

While this segment is a little short in regards to critique, it still is enough to give me a certainty in the ranking that I give.

In regards to Technical Skill, I give this book a 4/5.

Category 2 - Coherence (Plot)

As I told Leila before presenting her with this critique (which I do for all authors I critique), it’s hardly fair to judge someone’s real life on the basis of “plot”. It’s not really something they can help, and to adjust their life story in a memoir for the sake of making it ‘entertaining’ would be a shallow request within itself. Instead, the book is judged based on Coherence. That is, does the book’s events depicted follow an accurate timeline? Can I see the feelings and segments clearly without having to do extra research or jump through hoops? Simply put, does the book make sense?

Now this category isn’t a difficult one to hit, and as someone who doesn’t often read non-fiction/memoirs, I’m hardly the expert on measuring coherence. Even still, I didn’t ever really feel lost when reading Leila’s book except for one segment, which occurs at the beginning between segment 5 (which discusses her post-partum depression and her preeclampsia fears post her second child’s birth) and segment 8 (which jumps back to while she is still pregnant with her second child). Despite that tiny bump in the “story-line” so to speak, I had no issues following the story.

The emotions of the poems between the sections felt natural and fit well with the transitions between the memoir segments. We’re given a good glimpse at the process of her losing and regaining her faith, the anticipation up to her second pregnancy and how it compared to her first, the depression that struck during and after, and her relative recovery over the problems (as anyone with any serious condition will tell you that you never can truly recover).

In terms of Coherence, I give this book a 4/5.

Category 3 - Accuracy

This category is pretty self-explanatory. Is it obvious from the memoir that the person is being truthful or are they fictionalizing too many elements? Have they done their due diligence and their footwork to make sure any and all information they provided is correct? How much is dramatized or hammed up for the reader?

Leila did a fantastic job in Storm of Hope. While I did have to do a little research after in regards to Preeclampsia specifically, she cited sources for any technical information she did provide. The story from her perspective didn’t feel false or dramatic in anyway. Some of the events had me scratching my head like her story about the cop knocking on the window (it made me wonder how long she must have been waiting there for him to have shown up), but it wasn’t entirely out of the realm of possibility.

In fact, that was what helped to increase the impact of Leila’s Technical Skill score. Everything described was very no-nonsense, but didn’t carry over so far as to sound like someone reading a crime report. It was a story of the most revered sort: a recollection of events, complete with personal bias, observations, and interpretations. Accuracy in regards to real life, as far as I’m concerned, take a backseat to accuracy in regards to personal feelings and observations. If getting your cart bumped into by a jerk at the grocery store is the final straw that breaks the camel’s back of your already bad day, I’d rather the author let out all of the rage they felt over what would otherwise be a minor slight when retelling it, while also being able to admit “okay, so it wasn’t that bad, but at the time it was damned awful.”

The author does this almost flawlessly.

In terms of Accuracy, I give this book a 5/5.

Category 4 - Language/Entertainment

Now, while the Coherence segment does go over language in terms of readability and comprehension, this segment is meant solely to from a spot of enjoyment. Does the author build a good emotional tone? Did my feelings reflect the ones the author try to instill? Would I be able to empathize with the author or blow off their emotions as if they weren’t important?

This may seem like it comes from my personal side more than the author’s writing, but honestly, screw you guys. This is my critique, I’ll do what I want. Kidding, of course.

Having met Leila in real life (though I can’t say I know her intimately), what I’ve witnessed of her is very recognizable in her writing. She’s always been cheerful and upbeat when I’ve spoken to her, but the level of sass that she puts into her writing is perfectly placed.

It’s summed up perfectly by the first sentence in chapter (section?) five of the book. “Preeclampsia can suck it.” Almost immediately, I nodded my head and went, “Yep, that sounds exactly like something Leila would say.” Which is what made the parts about depression even more hard-hitting.

It was hard for me to picture the quiet, but otherwise kind and cheerful author going through such struggles, but it was still believable. It’s a short book, not even 100 pages long, but I still found myself tearing up a few times. I didn’t struggle to get through it at all, and even in books I enjoy I sometimes have to put it down for a break or two. This one, however, I read all in one sitting.

In terms of Language/Entertainment, I give this book a 5/5.

All in all, I give this book a Diamond rating of 4.5/5.

Seriously, read this book. I’m not going to go out on a limb and say something like “it changed my life forever”, because believe me that book will be one that I won’t be able to critique. In terms of non-fiction books I’ve read, this one is fantastic. It’s entertaining, it’s personal, it’s quick, and most importantly, it’s chock full of connectivity that will give you a great window into the author’s life.

Now, like I said, I’ve never been diagnosed with preeclampsia. As a man, I never will be. Even still, for those women who have gone through similar ordeals that the author has, this book will definitely help to make you realize that you’re not alone in your struggles. I recommend this book to anyone, but especially to mothers and those who struggle with preeclampsia or postpartum depression.

If you'd like to purchase this book, you can find it on Amazon here.
Please be sure to leave a review on the author's page. Your support is greatly appreciated!

With that out of the way, I'd like to take a moment to talk about something very serious.
Depression is something that affects many people in the world, and it's something that can be extremely harmful, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. A friend of mine once told me that depression is like a parasite. It doesn't want to be found, and as such, it drives those it affects to isolate themselves from the rest of the world.

Please, if you are struggling with depression, or if you know someone who is struggling with depression, the best thing you can do is to talk about it. Even if you don't want to visit a therapist, speak about it to your friends, your family, your pastor, whoever will listen. Every life is valuable, and there will always be someone who misses you. Never leave those people behind, no matter how hard depression hits you.

If you can't find anyone to talk to, or if you aren't comfortable talking about it with people you know, you can always call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. They're available 24/hours a day, any day, all day. The number is toll-free, so it doesn't cost any money and they will help you with any questions or problems you have. Suicide is never the answer. 

I may just be a humble book critic, but know that I care about and love each and every one of you. Keep yourself safe, and remember that you're never as alone as you feel. 

Thank you,
Kiba

Foxy Critique - Fairytale Apocalypse by Jacqueline Patricks

Hello everyone, this week’s blog is covering Fairytale Apocalypse by Jacqueline Patricks. Remember that my twaddle clause is in effect. Anything I say can and probably will be complete and utter twaddle. This critique is solely about the contents of the book and does not reflect my opinions on the author. Warning: This critique will contain spoilers. You have been warned.

Fairytale Apocalypse is a unique story that revolves around three individuals: a pair of twins and the Lord of the Verge, a Fae nobleman. One of the twins manages to enter into the Verge (Faerie world) being guided by the voice of the goddess Danu. She informs the lord that she is destined to be Lady of the Verge, and thus, is to be married to him. Her protective sister, on the other hand, also finds her way into the Verge in hopes of “rescuing” her sister. After getting her sister back and stopping the engagement, a cataclysmic magical event turns the mortal world into a barren wasteland, mad max/walking dead style. The rest of the book then focuses on finding a way to restore the world back to its original state.

I give this book a Silver score of 3.25/5.  

Now you may be asking yourself, ‘Why are you putting the book’s score at the beginning of the critique?’ Well, ask no longer. This book upsets me. Greatly. Like it rocks my very foundations to the core. Words can never be enough to express how much I wanted to flip my desk after reading the last page. Even still, I would recommend this book, if only so it will upset someone else so I can express my rage over it actively. That being said, while my criticisms may seem mostly negative, bear in mind that these are more for personal reasons than an analysis of the book’s technical contents.

Category 1: Literary Value

Literary value can be summed up as artistic expression and impact. Does the book challenge or reinforce important ideals? If it were a painting, would you hang it on a wall? Is it the sort of book you would leave on the coffee table to spark conversation or is it the sort you keep tucked with the rest of your collection?

This book is well written. I’ve said it, I’ve done my peace, now I can get to the meat and potatoes of it. Firstly, the level of description is crazy. I’d even go so far as to say it’s over the top to the point where it feels forced.

The story is original, and does a good job of blending the post apocalyptic genre with the high fantasy genre. The elements are well thought and the technique is more or less sound. There isn’t really much else I can say about it other than that.

In terms of Literary Value, I give this book a 4/5.

Category 2: Plot

Plot is the overarching story of the book and can be measured in terms of originality, entertainment value, and its ability to hook me in. A book with a high rating will be hard for me to put down, uses creative elements that aren’t cliche, and make me genuinely interested in what will happen to the characters next.

-deep breath- The story of this book is original. You don’t often see post apocalyptic combined with the surrealness of high fantasy, but the author does it well. The problem comes in when she tries to inject the romance.

Now, bear in mind, I am a romantic at heart. Truly, I am. I believe in soul mates and true love, and all that jazz. Romance/Fantasy is what I love, what I write, and what I know more than any other genre. Because of that, I typically come down harder on other writers of my genre. It’s sort of like two competing athletes. You can look at the other one and acknowledge their skill, but you’d be damned if you don’t criticize them for their every mistake.

That being said, the romance needs work. The best way I can think to explain it is like this: imagine if Beauty and the Beast had Belle and the Beast as twins. Belle, is madly in love with Gaston, but the Beast knows he’s an asshole. Now imagine if in the course of twenty four hours, the Beast changes his mind and ends up getting hitched with Gaston. Congratulations, you now understand the love triangle of this book.

In seriousness, the pacing is the plot’s glaring flaw. It feels like the book could be split completely in two, and it’s very irritating how clear cut the divide is. The problem I have is that the characters in the second half of the book shatter any preconceived notions you may have about them from the first half of the book, and not in a good way. I’ll get to that more in the Characterization segment.

Originality, I fear, isn’t enough to excuse the painful lack of karma that you want to see come of the characters. Get used to those disney analogies by the way, because they’re far from over.

In terms of plot, I give this book 3/5.

Category 3: Characterization

Characterization is measured in the quality of the characters found in the book. If you’ve read my previous blog posts, you’ll know that a character does not necessarily have to be a person. Good characterization shows depth, originality, adherence, and relatability. Note, a character can be a “bad guy” but be a good character. If you make me hate your villain, in terms of his character, then you’ve done your job well.

Alright, another deep breath. Here I go. This is going to be painful for all of us. Painful for me to go back over it, painful for the author reading it, and painful for the readers in that it’s going to mostly be me ranting.

I hate the characters. That’s all there is to it, I hate them. I only found myself able to relate to two characters in the story, and one of them dies and the other marries an asshole. So let’s do a basic breakdown of who they are and why I hate them.

Lauren (aka Laurie) is one of the story’s main protagonist. Specifically, she is the sister who is so overly eager to go to the Fae to escape her “horrible” twin. Lauren has what I like to call “singing gargoyle syndrome.” Ready for those disney references? So, “singing gargoyle syndrome” is the idea that a character who (while having slight importance to the story) has mannerisms that would be considered cute or endearing...in small doses.

Specifically, it gets its name from the Hunchback of Notre Dame (hands down, my favorite disney movie). I absolutely love the story, except for those damned singing gargoyles. Yes, they help Quasimoto, yes, they give him wonderful advice and push the story along, but their antics completely ruin the mood of the situation! When he’s alone and hurting, that is not the place in the story for an overly ecstatic musical number.

But I’m not reviewing hunchback, I’m reviewing Fairytale Apocalypse, so what does this have to do with anything? Well, simply put, Laurie is a wrecker of everything. She’s overly cheerful, teasing, wild, crazy, and above all stupid as dirt. Now, I’m a cheerful upbeat guy normally, but this girl runs around like she just did a boatload of crack.

But it gets worse. Laurie proves time and time again, that she’s as selfish as they come. All she really wants is power and authority to get out from under her tyranical twin (who is actually just making sure she doesn’t get into trouble).

Kagan Dunvall is an asshole. I’m sorry, but he is. Aside from shoving his weapon in damn near everyone’s face upon first meeting them (you’d think a nobleman would have more manners), all he ever really does is abuse those around them. The way he treats Lauren is the way a domestic abuser would treat their spouse, and despite all his talk about honor, he shows on multiple occassions that he doesn’t really stick to it well. Case in point: he won’t have willing sex with a sixteen year old girl. Okay, that makes sense. Good on you. However, he has no problems at all with the idea of murdering her unarmed twin sister. He even attacks her from behind. Like a dick.

But no, there’s more. Being a Fae, he’s constantly looking down on mortals and mocks them as weak and stupid in a superior-to-thou attitude. Needless to say, I am not a fan of him. Which makes the ending all that much more frustrating for me. But I’ll get to that with our next character.

Tessa is Lauren’s twin sister (and my favorite). Throughout the first half of the book she displays intelligence, reasoning, compassion, and most of all, it’s obvious she really cares for her sister. When Lauren first goes to the Verge, Tessa follows after solely to protect her.

Unfortunately for her, Danu doesn’t seem to smile as favorably upon her as she did Lauren, considering she seems to bump into every horrible threat in the Verge, only to just barely escape by the skin of her teeth due to her wits, her will power, or in some cases extreme amounts of luck.

In my opinion, Tessa is one of the only decent characters in the book. She goes to get her sister, who she’s convinced is in danger, only to  basically get the crap kicked out of her on the way through the castle until finally, she makes it to the ceremony and stops it (Good! Lauren’s 16! She doesn’t need to be marrying a centuries old asshole anyway!)

Anyway, after getting slashed by Kagan’s magical talking sword, it seemingly dies and her and her sister teleport back to their house where a month has passed over the course of a day. Then the apocalypse strikes, their parents die and everything goes to hell. Blaming Kagan for this (I mean, who else will she blame), Tessa vows hatred upon him.

Skip six years later (two days for Kagan)...

They live in an old military fort fighting against hollows (zombies) and rovers (raiders). Kagan manages to follow Lauren with his magical fiance gps when Tess finds him. Some stuff happens, Lauren gets captured (being the never-ending damsel in the story), and Tess has to swallow her grudge with Kagan to go save her twin.

Now this is where I take the issue. Over the course of two days...Tess drops her six year grudge, not only finds him tolerable (despite that he’s STILL an asshole), but then falls in love with him because crazy elven bdsm pheremones. Okay, so the last part is something I made up, but it’s basically just ‘magic’ that brings them together.

They find Lauren, Lauren still wants to marry Kagan, finds out Tess is interested and shoves her down, telling her to basically screw off because Kagan belongs to her. One Danu-ex-machina later, Lauren is Lady of the Verge, Kagan gives up his throne, and he marries Tess. Oh and believe me it reeeeally grinds my gears.

Simply put, Tessa should know better. She’s smarter than that. She’s seen, first hand, the jerk that Kagan is. And believe me a six year long grudge against a guy who tried to kill you doesn’t break in a day, magic be damned. In my personal opinion, Kagan doesn’t deserve her and she deserves better.

However, there is one more character I have to throw in as an honorable mention. Cenia is Lauren’s lesbian lover. For the six years that Kagan was gone, Lauren has sworn off men (as Danu told her to), so finding a loophole, she gets with this girl. Cenia, like Tess, quickly earns my favor. She loves Laurie. Like, genuine sacrifice-myself-for-you love. Even still, she is (again, like Tess) constantly thrown under the bus.

Literally, the same day Lauren agrees for them to be an actual couple, she straight up dumps her to go running back to Kagan when he shows up. Obviously, the girl is heart broken, and immediately she sees through Kagan’s bullshit. He doesn’t love her, and she knows it, and she even calls him out on it. He’s too much of an asshole to even deny that he doesn’t love her.

Well, when Lauren decides she’s going to make up for the last six years by marrying the asshole the next day anyway, Cenia makes an agreement with the Rovers. She lets them do a quick raid while everyone is distracted, take some people, and in exchange, Lauren stays unharmed and the two escape into the Wastes (desert).

Naturally, this backfires. After they beat and rape Lauren (yeah, it gets dark quick), Cenia is pissed that they went back on their deal. Cue Kagan and Tessa showing up. After a bloody and murderous game of tag, Kagan and Tessa make out and Kagan gets back his super powerful magic, and works to kill the entire army around them...where Cenia and Lauren happen to be. Cenia dies by leaping onto Lauren and shielding her with her body to keep her alive from Kagan’s magic. (Again, total asshole.)

Now, despite my rather long rant, the characters are pretty well developed. They each have their personalities and are well designed, but the only problem is they either A)Break character too often or B) Are just plain unlikable.

Now, I loved Tessa as a character, as I explained earlier, but when Kagan comes in the second half of the book, everything I loved about her just seemed to disappear. She stopped being the brave, independent, headstrong protector of her little sister. She turned into a weak, sniveling, grumpy girl. When her and Kagan finally get together, he dominates her completely, which is a complete atrocity to her character and potential.

In Characterization, I give this story a 2/5.

Category 4: World Building/Setting:

I already gave props earlier for Ms. Patricks’ creativity and originality in combining the post apocalyptic genre with high fantasy. It was obvious she put a great amount of detail into the story, and she did a pretty good job of fleshing out everything needed without going into a big info dump (one of the most common pitfalls of a fantasy writer).

However, at times it felt as if it swung too far the other way. Despite all of her physical description, I found myself overwhelmed more by all the terminology and technicality of the Verge and its mechanics. It’s mentioned that Danu is one of many Fae gods, but her name is literally the only one ever mentioned. A sylph in the story (who claims she’s not very threatening compared to what else is in the Verge) kills a hag which according to Kagan later is basically the boogey man of the Verge. All in all, a lot of it feels disconnected or just thrown in for the heck of it.

It’s my understanding the author writes primarily short stories, and to be honest, it shows in her segways and transitions. Even still, I found myself interested and entranced by the swords and sorcery of the world, and because of that, I’m willing to give her a pretty high score.

For World Building/Setting, I give this story a 4/5.

Now let’s go back to the start for a moment. The story gets a 3.25/5 but I gave over a page of reasons for why I hated the book? It just doesn’t make sense, right? Well, I don’t really hate the book. It was an entertaining read and I did enjoy the time I spent reading it. Many of the events and characters severely pissed me off (at one point I was ready to punch a hole through my wall in frustration). But I could say the same thing about Game of Thrones and Harry Potter.

When you get attached to a character and that character gets killed off in an otherwise humiliating way (Sirius falls behind a curtain and dies. I mean, c’mon) it hurts. But the only thing that hurts more than that for me is seeing a character you really love and respect losing all the things that make them great and winding up with a character you just can’t stand.

Once again, I give this book a silver rating of 3.25/5.

I recommend you pick it up if you’re a fan of high fantasy and are looking for something different. If you’re a heavy-hearted romantic like myself who becomes a little too attached to characters in the story, I caution you before picking it up. I’m not going to say not to read it, but if you do, prepare for for a week of cursing, throwing the book across the room, and overall grumpiness.

You can buy Fairytale Apocalypse by Jacqueline Patricks here.
Remember to leave a review if you do read it. Thank you all for your support. 

Foxy Critique: The Adventures of Miss Vulpe - Maria Elena Sandovici

Hello everyone, welcome to Foxy Critique. Today I will be critiquing the novel The Adventures of Miss Vulpe by Maria Elena Sandovici. As usual, I will provide you with my twaddle warning: that any thing I say is expressly my opinion and as such it is up to you, the readers, whether or not to take what I say as complete and utter twaddle. They do not reflect my view on the writer themselves, but on the content within. There are potential spoilers in this critique, you have been warned. 

The Adventures of Miss Vulpe is the story of teen rebel Ana whose parents both died in a double suicide. After her Grandmother passed, she found herself under the guardianship of her mother's first husband who she despises with a passion. Vowing to make his life miserable, she rebels against every school he puts her in.  Returning to her childhood home, she's now out to solve the mystery of her parents' death and prove that she's an adult to her new lover. 

Category 1: Literary Value
Literary value can be summed up as artistic expression and impact. Does the book challenge or reinforce important ideals? If it were a painting, would you hang it on a wall? Is it the sort of book you would leave on the coffee table to spark conversation or is it the sort you keep tucked with the rest of your collection?

The "coming of age" story is one that's been done quite a bit, but if done correctly it can be the difference between cliche and exceptional. The Adventures of Miss Vulpe falls somewhere in the middle. 

Conceptually, the story is there, but the execution falls a little flat, especially when it comes to Ana maturing over the course of the story. I'll get more into that later. Continuing on, the thing that stuck out to me first in the story is that a majority of it is written in present tense. At first, I found it difficult to read because of this, but eventually I became well enough adjusted that it didn't bother me too greatly. 

Typically, the problem I had with the story was that it felt rushed. It was a swift read, but it wasn't because I found it to be a page turner, but more that it flew by. Not to mention that the story was divided between present day and the past of Rogers and Richard, Ana's half was cut even shorter. 

In terms of Literary Value, I give this book a 3/5. 

Category 2: Plot

Plot is the overarching story of the book and can be measured in terms of originality, entertainment value, and it's ability to hook me in. A book with a high rating will be hard for me to put down, uses creative elements that aren't cliche, and make me genuinely interested in what will happen to the characters next. 

The plot was intriguing to say the least...well, in a sense. I found myself more interested in the death of the parents more so than any interactions between Ana and the other characters. The chapters with her and Richard where she wanted to find out more stuff but kept backing out of the questions were agonizing! 

The story had a very J. D. Salinger (aka the man who wrote Catcher in the Rye) feel to it. I couldn't find much of a connection with it because of a lack of adventure or excitement. It was a little bland, to be honest. 

The biggest problem however, is that the central struggle of the plot (Ana keeping her identity secret from Richard because of her young age) was rendered moot simply from a lack of research. The story puts heavy emphasis on the fact that Ana is 16, and that she's stuck between girlhood and womanhood, desperately wanting to be a woman, but too fearful to abandon her childish tendencies. When Richard finally finds out, they get into a huge argument and at one point he fears he'd be imprisoned for statutory rape. Within this lies the problem. 

The story takes place in Romania, but the legal age of consent in Romania is 15. That being said, the conflict is pretty much unnecessary, at least in regards to her age. Her identity, however, should have been made more of a priority.

Even still, it was cohesive and well planned. I enjoyed the sections where it went into the pass of Richard and Rogers, and I'd have liked to see more of their past instead of the info dump Richard lays on her in the end. 

In terms of Plot, I give this story a 3/5. 

Category three: Characterization
Characterization is measured in the quality of characters found in the book. If you've read my previous blog posts, you'll know that a character does not necessarily have to be a person. Good characterization shows depth, originality, adherence, and relatability. Note a character can be a "bad guy" but be a good character. If you make me hate your villain, in terms of his character, then you've done your job well.

I always hate having to give negative feedback for characters, but as much as I wanted to connect with Ana, she and I, I fear, are not compatible. Ana is what some of us in the literary word call a "mary sue". That is to say that as a character, she's practically free of consequences for her actions. 

Throughout the course of the story, Ana does some pretty messed up things. From selling bayleaves and baking soda to students (by tricking them into thinking its marijuana and cocaine), to stealing pretty much anything in arm's reach, she never gets any recompense other than an eye roll or a lecture. 

The worst part of it is, she seems to do it for absolutely no reason. She does it to torment Rogers, but it isn't until the very end that she ever stops once to consider why she should torment him. Her personality is very two dimensional. She's a rebel. That summarizes her up completely, and she hardly progresses at all. 

While her mother is dead by the start of the story and she says she loves her dearly, there isn't much in the way of showing it. She cries a few times, but it lacks the oomph to earn my sympathy. A lot of the problems she faces are from her own immaturity, and simply put, she made her bed, so I'm content to let her lay in it. 

Richard and Rogers were semi-interesting, but again, their personalities were flat. Richard is a wealthy womanizer, Rogers is a well-meaning introvert. None of the characters really "change" over the story. Ana's transformation from child to adult...honestly just makes her seem more immature. 

In terms of Characterization, I give this book a rating of 2/5. 

Category 4: World Building/Setting
World Building and Setting are a judgment of the scenery behind the characters. How interested am I in the background events. Did the author go into great detail about the world they live in or did they keep the scope narrow. If I close my eyes, can I picture myself in a world that's cinematic, or does it come off like the scribbles of a toddler?

There was a lot of telling of locations, but little showing. The scenery and depiction of the people in Louisiana was wonderfully done, but the scenes elsewhere: Romania, Switzerland, Spain... all of them depicted...well, nothing. There was no description of scenery, no cultural difference in behavior, nothing. At first, I thought they were in America, until Ana explained Rogers spoke terrible Romanian when he was trying to have a conversation with their cab driver.

As I mentioned in the category 'Plot' there didn't feel like much research went into the story. The scenery falls a little flat, like the characters. I want to be able to feel myself there. I want to experience the world through the characters, but I can't do that if I don't know what the world is like around them. 

In terms of World Building/Setting, I give the book a rating of 2/5. 

Over all, The Adventures of Miss Vulpe receives a Bronze rating of 2.5/5. 

All in all, the story wasn't bad. It had a beginning, middle, and end. When it was over, I felt satisfied that the things that piqued my interest had been resolved, but it still left me wanting more. My biggest struggle to overcome was Ana. As someone who has been in a similar boat that she's in, it pushes hard on my nerves that she never learns her lesson. Even when she makes peace with Rogers and stops stealing things, she's still the same old spoiled brat. The source of the problem isn't solved, and while I can appreciate that she's sort of working on it, the fact that everyone has forgiven her seems a bit too convenient. 

She says at one point that "idiocy is more unattractive than a missing eye or buck teeth", which normally I'd agree with...which is why it's ironic that she's so unintelligent. True, she's a child, but her naivety and foolishness aren't the endearing ones that you come to experience from young men and women. It's not cute, it's just frustrating. 

While I wouldn't rant and rave about this book to my friends, or try to push it on to fellow readers, I also wouldn't actively discourage people against reading it. I'm sure there's someone out there who enjoys it, and that's okay. However, from a critical perspective, it could use a bit more work and polish. 

You can buy the book on amazon here.
If you do enjoy the book, please be sure to leave a review for the author. They help more than you realize. 

Foxy Critique: Flooded By - T. Haven Morse

Welcome to Foxy Critique, today I'll be critiquing the book Flooded By: A Persona Poetry Collection by T. Haven Morse.(Henceforth, just called Flooded By for brevity's sake). We'll break the book down by a few distinct categories, with explanations of how I came to my conclusions on each one. Note that the views expressed in this blog are my own personal ones on the book itself, and do not reflect my views on the author. Like or dislike a book, you'll always be able to find a link at the bottom of the page for purchase. Please support the book's official release.

Category 1: Literary Value
Literary value can be summed up as artistic expression and impact. Does the book challenge or reinforce important ideals? If it were a painting, would you hang it on a wall? Is it the sort of book you would leave on the coffee table to spark conversation or is it the sort you keep tucked with the rest of your collection?

Flooded By is an interesting collection of poems in that it separates them into "chapters" by emotions. While each poem follows the emotions of the section they're in, each one is based around a fictional character that in some way shape or form embodies the emotion the poem is about. The author expresses that while these are not based off of real people, that she views them as her muse coming to her in different voices and characters.

When I first started reading I immediately knew that this woman was an extraordinary poet. Poetry is strange in that it has rules, but also has no rules. It's different from prose writing in that it can break grammar and sentence structure and pretty much every other law of writing.

However, you can tell a good poet from a bad poet through the way they limit themselves. As I said before, poetry has rules and while those rules can be broken, it's always impressive to see someone choose to format their poem in a specific set of rules. The only way I can think to explain this is like watching someone play pool. Sure, you can play a good game of pool, but it won't be nearly as impressive as the next guy who can do trick shots with the same level of accuracy. Morse's poems come in a wide variety and styles of formats. Some are free-form, others have set rhythms, but over all they show a good head for the mechanics of poetry.

In terms of Literary Value, I give Flooded By a 4/5. 

Category 2: Plot
Plot is the overarching story of the book and can be measured in terms of originality, entertainment value, and it's ability to hook me in. A book with a high rating will be hard for me to put down, uses creative elements that aren't cliche, and make me genuinely interested in what will happen to the characters next.

Flooded By, being a poetry collection, has about as much plot as you'd expect from a poetry collection. That is to say, not very much over arching. While I do enjoy poetry, it isn't the sort of thing I tend to enjoy reading back to back to back.

It did take me a few days to get through Flooded By, but it most definitely made for an effective "waiting" book. Basically, it's the book you carry with you in case you're waiting somewhere and you want something to do. Doctor's office? Read the book. DMV? Book. Waiting for dinner in the oven? Book. You get the idea.

It was entertaining. While the stories of the unique characters didn't hook together, it performed as one would reasonably expect an entertaining poetry collection to perform.

In terms of Plot, I give Flooded By a 3/5. 

Category 3: Characterization
Characterization is measured in the quality of characters found in the book. If you've read my previous blog posts, you'll know that a character does not necessarily have to be a person. Good characterization shows depth, originality, adherence, and relatability. Note a character can be a "bad guy" but be a good character. If you make me hate your villain, in terms of his character, then you've done your job well.

This is where Flooded By shines by far. Each poem is its own character, and each character gives a glimpse into another life. No two poems are alike, and I don't just mean in terms of word content. Apart, they do an excellent job of standing alone, but when put into a collection like this, it provides a colorful cast with a unique array of personalities.

Having met Morse personally, it is astounding how well she can give the point of view of characters that are so unlike herself, which only adds to the impressiveness of it all. You'll find people you laugh along with, ones you have great disdain for, and others that you want to see triumph.

In terms of Characterization, I give Flooded By a 5/5. 

Category 4: World Building/Setting
World Building and Setting are a judgment of the scenery behind the characters. How interested am I in the background events. Did the author go into great detail about the world they live in or did they keep the scope narrow. If I close my eyes, can I picture myself in a world that's cinematic, or does it come off like the scribbles of a toddler?

As I mentioned in the Plot segment, as a poetry collection, there isn't really an overarching setting to the story. Simply put, it's not important to the enjoyment of the book. Knowing where the characters of the poems are doesn't really matter because they're so realistic they can be anywhere. That being said, I'm electing to retract judgment on Category 4.

In terms of World Building/Setting, Flooded By is not judged. 

Over all: Flooded By gets a positive Gold score of 4/5. 

Okay, so for those of you who dislike poetry, the book probably won't give you too much in the way of value. Not that the poetry isn't good (it's very talented writing), but it certainly isn't going to be changing people's minds on how they feel about poetry in general. For those of you who do like poetry though, it's going to become a quick favorite. I've been slinging my copy of Flooded By around to show off to all of my poet friends.  It's exactly what you'd expect from a poetry collection, and yet, thanks to the characterization of the book it still remains above average.

This is a book I highly recommend to poetry lovers, and the poetry curious. If you're a prose junkie though you'll still find entertainment in it, but probably not as much as you would a novel of your chosen genre.

You can find Flooded By on Amazon here.
Always be sure to leave a review on books you've read, your support means everything to authors.

Constant Connotation

Constant Connotation

Hello everyone! Today we’ll be learning about something you’ve heard me talk about alot. Diction is a concept that is simple to understand but difficult to master. At its base diction is simply your vocabulary, but in depth and practice it is far more than such. If I had to choose one lesson that is the most important, learning diction is by far the most essential skill for a writer to have. Any five year old can tell a story, make up a character, or describe two people hitting each other. Don’t believe me? Next time you meet a child, be it your own or one you know, ask them to tell you a story, and you’ll see what I mean.

Diction is vital because it helps expand our Connotative Vocabulary. You’re probably wondering why that’s in italics. It’s because connotative vocabulary is just that important to maintain, and similarly to learning math, it builds upon itself. So what’s the difference between connotative vocabulary and just plain old...well, vocabulary.

Simple concept, difficult practice: Connotation is an implied meaning of a word, thus connotative vocabulary is the collection of implied meanings of words known by a person. Inversely, typical vocabulary can also be called literal vocabulary which consists of the literal definition of the word. Sound easy so far? Good, because it’s about to get a bit more complicated than that.

If you’re a little shaky on the idea of connotation, we’ll put it like this: certain words when used have a negative or positive feeling or emotion that is attached to them. These emotions are connotation, and when you’re a writer, selecting the proper connotation is absolutely vital for setting a scene’s mood and tone. If you look back on all of my posts, I guarantee you, at least somewhere in every one, it’s recommended that you expand your word usage. This is because connotation is what separates the authors from the five year olds.

Let’s take a look at one of the most common words in need of connotation: “said”. You’ll often hear English teachers tell students to never use the word “said” because it is a boring word, and a dead word. Now I won’t say never use it, but most certainly when you’re a starting writer, learning to replace “said” with a better word is lesson number one.

“Said” is the past tense and past participle of the word “say”, which is defined as “To utter words so as to convey information, an opinion, a feeling or intention, or an instruction.” In layman’s terms, it’s to speak. “Say” and thus, “said” are very neutral words. They don’t really present any connotation in the sense that they don’t elicit particular emotions.

Contrarily, look at the words: hissed, growled, roared, screamed, shouted, hollered, bellowed, boomed, screeched, grumbled. Each one can be considered a literal synonym of “said” but, you’ll notice that all of them have a negative connotation. Now, that’s not to say they always have a negative connotation. Connotation changes with context. Depending on what an author writes, the words can be negative or positive. Take “roared” specifically. If your boss is roaring at you, it’s different than if you’re standing on stage and can hear the roar of the crowd. Same word, different context.

“Okay, I get it now. So words like laughed, grinned, teased, joked, chuckled, giggled, smiled, beamed, etc. are all positive connotation?” Right! Except that they also can have a negative connotation. It may be difficult to find it, but think of the Joker from Batman. When he’s laughing, chances are, no one else is. It all is applied to context.

So you may think you’ve connotation down now, well the answer to that is...no. Sorry to say, that’s only scratching the bare minimum surface of what connotation is all about. If you have ever read the book Frindle by Andrew Clements, you’ll understand that the meaning of words rests solely on the people. If you haven’t read the book, the basic plot is that a boy, eager to shake up the system, convinces all of his friends to start calling pens, ‘frindles’. Then, like a virus, it spreads until the entire world has rejected the word ‘pen’ and now calls them ‘frindle’. Why is this important? Well it shows that the definition of a word, literal and connotative is determined solely by the people as a whole. That’s right, vocabulary is more universal and less corrupt than the government. Hard to believe, right?

This power, as Uncle Ben would say, comes with a great responsibility, specifically for writers. That responsibility is to not screw it up. Do not butcher the Queen’s English, so to speak. As a writer, whether you want to admit it or not, we answer to the people. If people don’t like what you have to say, surprise, they’re not going to buy your book or what have you. The fastest way to lose their attention is to incorrectly use connotation, or worse (as it sends skilled writers screaming from their beds in their nightmares) using no connotation at all (i.e. “Said”).

Connotation requires a good knowledge of a word, including some complex aspects of it: etymology, literal definition, and sometimes, even careful thought and interpretation. Let’s take an example. Most of you have probably not heard the word “simper”. It’s not too common, and at its core means ‘to smile’. But simpering is not just smiling, it is much more than that. Specifically, when a person simpers, they’re smiling in a way that is ungenuine, typically to gain the trust of someone through acting coy or lustful. Girl walks up to the bar, flirts with you a bit, gets a drink from you and then leaves. Chances are, that smile you saw on her face as she talked to you was her simpering. See what I mean?

-raises hand- “Can’t we just use the thesaurus?” NO! One of the most frustrating things I typically have to dissuade my students from is the concept that words provided by a thesaurus are completely interchangeable. They are not, so if you have it in your head from our flawed education system that they are, stop it. Get it out, put it in a trash can, douse it with gasoline, and set it on fire. Now, I’m not calling the thesaurus useless. On the contrary, they can be an incredibly useful tool...when used with a dictionary.

See, synonyms aren’t exact replicas of a word. That’d be stupid. Why would we have two words that mean the exact same thing, even if they’re completely different? There’d be no point! Now there are some words that when observed vaguely have the same meaning, but we’re writers: we don’t do vague. We do the specific. We don’t want our readers to feel whatever they want when reading our work, because that leads them to the feeling of boredom. As writers, our duty is show them what to feel and where.

By combining the use of a dictionary and a thesaurus, (assuming you have good versions of both) you’ll be able to line up context, literal definition, and connotation to gain: -triumphant fanfare- the connotative definition.

The connotative definition is the literary sweet spot of vocabulary. It means you know when and where a word should be used, and when someone uses it incorrectly, you’ll frown and shake your head in pity. A word to the wise: improving your connotative definition will make you a much better writer...it will also make you a super picky reader. Books you’ve loved will suddenly lower in quality, and books you’ve hated...well you’ll wonder what the heck happened and why they can get published but not you.

I’ve said before that the key to being a better writer is to practice it every day, well this is what you practice! You have to learn new connotations all the time, and you have to learn where the pieces fit and how. Believe me, this is tough work. There are times where you will know the connotation, but if someone were to ask you, you’ll have to kind of pause and think for a moment to come up with a way to explain it.

Let’s look at a simple word: ‘hissed’. We all know, at a core, what a hiss is. It’s a noise made by some animals to denote unhappiness, be it a cat, snake, cockroach, what have you. However, when used in context with a person’s speech, it usually means to say it quietly, often (but not always) through gritted teeth and in an angry or commanding tone. That’s something of a mouthful isn’t it?

Now, you all knew that. You know people (and animals) don’t hiss when they’re happy or laid back. No one writes, “‘Hey bro, let’s get some drinks by the pool,’ he hissed.” It wouldn’t make any sense, because the connotation and context are off. But when you read the words, you can almost imagine a person, a scowl on their face, teeth grit grabbing some guy and hissing those words to him. It’s an odd sight and experience, and it’s the best way to realize how things fit contextually. If you’re using a word, try to imagine what you want your character or scene to look like.

However, there’s an unseen danger with connotation. I’m guilty of it often, as are many others: we pick favorites. For example, I greatly enjoy the words gently and softly. If you take a look back to A Boy and His Fox, you’ll find the words are used...a lot. Even now, I have to pause and remind myself that perhaps while in my head the character is performing an action gently or softly, it may not be the best time to inform the audience of that, because some contexts speak for themselves.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Glad you asked. One of the most helpful tools in our box is adverbs. Adjectives that are used to describe actions. It can also be one of the most redundant. If someone’s shouting something, you don’t need to say they’re shouting loudly. By literal and connotative definition, shouting is loud. However, if you’re looking to put more ‘umph’ behind it, you could say ‘shouting as loudly as possible’. Now we kind of nod our heads and go ‘Okay, so it’s not just him shouting, but it’s him going as loud as he possibly can go.’ See? Less redundant, better explanation.

Now, sometimes things don’t need connotation. Remember what I said about ‘said’ still having a place? Well this is that place. Let’s look at this conversation, without dialogue tags.

“Hey, what do you want to grab to eat?”

“Whatever’s fine.”

Now, let’s try adding a dialogue tag to both of them.

“Hey, what do you want to grab to eat?” he asked.

“Whatever’s fine,” she said.

So now, since her response was not meant to be neither positive nor negative, using said is helpful. Said is a neutral word, and thus it provides a very important and helpful function when combined with adverbs. It allows us to cheat our way through connotation. “What?! We get to cheat?” Yes, but keep it under your hat. It’s a bit of a trade secret, see? So, shush.

What I mean by that is, if you have a particular idea in mind of how you want something to play out, but you don’t know a good word to use that sets that idea you’re aiming for said can help you lay the foundation to describe what you mean.

For example, a while back I was having a conversation with someone. I asked them for a good word to use when someone is saying something calmly, but you can tell that beneath it is a barely contained rage. The character is literally at their last straw, and instead of getting into a shouting match, they’re counting to ten, holding their breath, and putting a leash on their emotions in order to make a last ditch attempt to end the disagreement, knowing that they’re one stupid comment away from having their brain snap like a twig, and possibly committing homicide. For the record, the word we eventually found by definition is ‘seethed’, but the point is, if I couldn’t have found a good word for that, I could have just as easily used a dialogue tag like “she said calmly, the rage she was struggling to hold back just a breath away from boiling out.” See?

Bear in mind, do not overuse this ‘cheat’. If you do, your audience will catch on, quickly become bored, and toss your book out the window. On the other hand, if the word you use is too uncommon, be careful selecting it, as (while knowing many words is impressive) your readers will not like having to overly think in order to put the pieces together. You have to give them the picture on the box if you want them to solve the puzzle, get it?

Okay, so now you guys are kind of starting to accept all this mumbo jumbo. Connotation is essential, so learning it is good, but like all things, it is to be used in moderation and correctly. There’s no harm in knowing off the wall connotation (i.e. simper, I just love that word) but save it for impressing people in rare instances, not as a constant party trick like your friend Steve who loves to show off how he can open a bottle with his belly button. It gets old. Using adverbs can alter connotation or allow the explaining of a connotation when you can’t find a word for it.

Now, one of the things that made me popular when I first started writing fan fiction is my upload speed. We’re talking two, possibly even three chapters in a single day, each one around 4,000 words long. The most common question that I get is “What’s your secret?” and typically I give an answer like “It just sort of comes pouring out.” Now while that’s true, there is a secret behind it, and this -waves hand at the entire post-, this is it!

More connotation vocabulary means less time deciding on words you should use, less worrying about wording for context, less thinking how best to say what you want, because with connotation vocabulary you can already KNOW the best way to say what you want. Past that, it’s all a matter of 1) rereading your own work to find holes in clarity, 2) using the thesaurus AND dictionary to learn new possibilities for contextual situations, and 3) practicing putting them in the right place in the correct manner.

Every single day (save weekends, typically) I write at the very least, 5000 words a day. That’s an entire chapter, and while I’m not saying you have to write that much, writing every day is the best way to help build up your skill with context and connotation. When you write more often, you’ll find yourselves in different contexts with which to learn different connotations.

Now, for the writing exercise. Take the following words: said, get, and went. Then come up with ten synonyms for each and write your own connotative meaning for those synonyms. Bonus points if you can craft a sentence with it. I’ll provide an example for each.

Said: state - to say audibly in such a manner that is formal or straight to the point, typically for the sake of providing information or declaring a stance. “Mr. President, I am not going to do battle with these aliens,” the general stated.

Get: fetch - to collect an object at variable distances, only to return it to the location from which the collector started from. I often throw my dog’s toy, but he never shows an interest in fetching it.

Went: walk - to move or guide, on foot, at a casual pace that indicates the subject is neither in a hurry, nor is ceasing its progress. Having come to a steep hill, I climbed off my bike to walk it the rest of the way.

Now you guys try. Don’t go completely bonkers on this assignment and starting finding crazy words that are never used in daily conversation. The value of this prompt is to find an in-depth connotative definition for synonyms that can replace often overused words.

As always, I wish you the best of luck in life and literature,

Kiba